He's got a nice full head of jet black hair, swiming in his nike dri-fit tech T, flanked on either side by a menez sister (Alanna to my left and Janelle to my right), and... smiling! That dude was a happy runner. That was 2 years ago. Before I was consumed by PRs. Running was still fun. Now my head is sprinkled w/ grey, I'm 10-15 lbs heavier and I've lost my air support.
Not to say that I don't enjoy it now, but Jesus, I put a lot of pressure on myself. I am without a doubt a stronger runner now than I was then, but in contrast to that same runner, I'm also lacking a whole lot of confidence. And without confidence, it's hard to accomplish much of anything.
There's nothing I want more than to be cheered on along the course by my friends and greeted at the finish by my wife and daughter as I finish under my goal time. I've imagined what that feeling would be like; the thought of it makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. But the last 4 marathons have ruined my confidence and what used to feel so real and within reach, is now as unattainable as me winning American Idol season 11 (they are coming to SD next year).
With that said, I'm asking that you don't come out for me. However, if you find the urge to get up super early on a sunday and spectate a marathon, do it for the thousands of others out there. Perhaps, it's their first marathon; they need you. Maybe they're running for a charity; they need you too. Maybe they're running 5 months pregnant; they most definitely need you.
Like me, these stranger will appreciate everyone on the race course cheering them on. Unlike me, they won't dissapoint you.
We've ridden in this rodeo one too many times Ry. No negative talking. Think of your marathon last month as one bad-ass long run. You're ready to break 4 hours.
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